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Settling softly
A graceful fall
Pirouetting in crystal air
A dance of elegance
Lost in the multitude
Ended by the earth's firm kiss.

The snowflake sinks
Into a bed of brethren
Becomes one with all
Singularity surrendered
To join the Drift
In blissful anonymity.

Motionless
That which was
Lies silent
Smothered and smothering
Awaiting thaw
And Spring's release.

One wonders
Does it now regret
The fall from grace
Abandoning its dance
Or does it slumber, fury faded
Knowing peace at last?
The snow's been falling here in Scotland, and it's bloody freezing! It looks nice, but it's not much use for anything else.

Except for inspiration, that is. I was watching a blizzard through a lecture threatre window when this idea came to me - what if a snowflake was sentient? Would it embrace its inevitable demise on the hard ground or would it regret the loss of its freedom?

This piece came from that thought. I'd appreciate you comments and criticism. Enjoy :)
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Daily Deviation

Given 2004-03-17
Snowfall Dances by ~saladin Pretend you are a flake. Okay, pretend you are a snowflake and you are falling toward the earth. The poet asks, "Would it embrace its inevitable demise on the hard ground or...? You might be tempted to answer this inspiring question, so read "Snowfall Dances". You'll find it full of fascinating lines like, "Pirouetting in crystal air..." which may just tempt you to love the listening. ( Featured by jsenn )
:iconrumblefish2112:
RumbleFish2112 Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2009
Did you choke on those big words you used like you choked on that $@^%
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:iconliveialone:
liveialone Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2005   Writer
pretty....
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:iconmysensezfailme:
mysensezFailme Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2004
awesome poem...i have written a similar shot-story for english class once...
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:iconnaniloa86:
naniloa86 Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2004  Student Digital Artist
awesome poem... where i live, snow plays a big role in winter.
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:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2004
We don't really get so much of it in Ireland...

...but in Glasgow it'd freeze the bollocks off you :(
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:iconlieth:
Lieth Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2004   Writer
Congratulations on writing a great poem. The short lines and eloquent use of words came together well. Your imagery was vivid and animated, as in the lines “Pirouetting in crystal air” and “The snowflake sinks/ Into a bed of brethren”. The poem was also sensuous as in “kiss” and “smothering”. The poem also had a peaceful, tranquil tone created by the words “softly” “bed” “motionless” “silent” “peace” and perhaps reinforced by the short lines, which somehow seemed as though they were meant to be quietly and slowly. You were also able to reach an effective conclusion by becoming more abstract and distanced but still maintaining unity.
Once again, well done.
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:iconlieth:
Lieth Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2004   Writer
Congratulations on writing a great poem. The short lines and eloquent use of words came together well. Your imagery was vivid and animated, as in the lines “Pirouetting in crystal air” and “The snowflake sinks/ Into a bed of brethren”. The poem was also sensuous as in “kiss” and “smothering”. The poem also had a peaceful, tranquil tone created by the words “softly” “bed” “motionless” “silent” “peace” and perhaps reinforced by the short lines, which somehow seemed as though they were meant to be quietly and slowly. You were also able to reach an effective conclusion by becoming more abstract and distanced but still maintaining unity.
Once again, well done.
Reply
:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2004
Thank you for the indepth comment.

Intelligent feedback is something rare on this site. :salute:
Reply
:iconcontrafool:
ContraFool Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2004
Oh wow, this is very good. I never really thought of snow as a concious thing before, but now that I think about it, it makes sense. It does seem to move like it has a mind of it's own and you have captured it beautifully in your poem and posed an interesting question to which I'm afraid humanity cannot know the answer. Great job!! --Erik
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:icondaeira:
daeira Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2004
I..

Just lovely I would say. So simplistic and beautiful. The thoughts of a snowflake - now that's original. And that last stanza is so great.

Great work.
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:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2004
Thank you for the kind words.

I'm glad you enjoyed my work :) :hug:
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:iconpeace-love-happiness:
I do wonder. Perhaps it is like falling asleep, I might muse (thinking on the bright side), sort of a gentle leaving-of-consciousness...I could ponder on more unpleasant sides of the thought, but I prefer the gentler ones you have presented. Lovely poem. "fury faded" is especially interesting...they do seem furious in their blizzarding sometimes, n'est-ce pas? *smiles, amused*
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:iconrazureoblivion:
razureoblivion Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2004
wow. simply beautiful. I love your words.
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:iconshinigamimaxwell:
shinigamimaxwell Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004  Hobbyist General Artist
Wonderful poem..I loved the imagery, and it was a wonderful read. Well done :clap:
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:iconjphnx22:
jphnx22 Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
One wonders
Does it now regret
The fall from grace
Abandoning its dance
Or does it slumber, fury faded
Knowing peace at last?


OMG how could you create such a beautiful poem like this. this is very impressive because with the simple elegance you paint an amazing sybolism in this piece. :+fav:
Reply
:iconzirio:
zirio Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
That is one of the most interesting peices I've read on DevArt. The depth of the thought is really interesting. The questions it sparks make me want to answer. It's provoking thought, and wanting to inspire pictures. What I liked the most, though, was that I saw it play out in my head, and it was very fluid. I could see the snowflakes, and it's a really weird feeling, but it was fun, nonetheless.
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:iconminiweat:
Miniweat Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Wow, that is an excellent work. You are very talented.
Reply
:iconopacus-somnium:
opacus-somnium Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Oh, you've just reminded me how much I love snow. I don't think I've ever read a more beautiful poem about nature. I'll memorize this and recite it to my grandnieces and -nephews in winter when I'm a scraggly old woman without any teeth. :+favlove:
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:iconcatching:
catching Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
"Ended by the earth's firm kiss" is my favorite line by far. Good work. :clap:
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:iconasteriatic:
asteriatic Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
I don't usually comment or favourite poetry, but there's something about this paticular piece that I really love. Bravo.
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:iconvincentvangone:
VincentVanGone Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
extremely well constructed and feels to me exactly like what it's describing...the question at the end has crossed my mind (as it no doubt has many) before, but never could i have put it down so effectively...thanks for the wonderful read.
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:iconozymandias-:
Ozymandias- Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Your magnificent imagery is displayed vividly across my mind. A beautiful poem. I have no gripes with it.

:+fav:
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:iconsharkoftheday:
sharkoftheday Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004  Hobbyist Writer
Outstanding, in ways it relates to the cycle of life (or cycle of death death as i call it). Therefore, I am inclined to answer that the snowflake finds serenity. It dies, lies forgotten with the multitude, but it is part of the snowflakes cycle. It shall again rise (reincarnation) by melting and evaporating and fall as rain, living once again briefly. It knew that it would eventually lie silent upon the earth and it could have accepted this and let come what will come or it could strive to stay afloat in the winds.
Reply
:icontarnishedoversoul:
tarnishedoversoul Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
congrats on the daily dev feature- we up and Canada have been getting a bit of snow up here lately as well, but I've never thought anything nice about the cold stuff.
Reply
:iconunorthodoxfaith:
unorthodoxfaith Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
I asw this on the daily deviations list...Wow! You are an amazing poet...you say some much, your work is beautiful...Such imagery! You should be proud to call yourself a poet hee hee
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:iconsoulwrai:
soulwrai Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
great bloody work brilliant imagery that is purely enrapturing to read, great job once more
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:icondarkphoenixember:
darkphoenixember Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Beautiful poetry, you are talented! This poem is just to beautifula and awesome. :+fav:

Not to mention thought provoking. ;)
Reply
:iconebokat:
ebokat Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
what a wonderfully graceful & poignant poem.
lovely way to present the age-old human questions
r/t life & death, through an elegant,crystalline dance.
Reply
:iconpennylanechic:
pennylanechic Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Writer
read it through again and i've decided--- fav +
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:iconpennylanechic:
pennylanechic Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Writer
gorgeous imagery- some of the best use of it i have ever read, whether on DA or not-- great use of word choice, really well done-- i felt as if i was the snowflake on this journey from the sky that you described-- this is a wonderful poem- and im so jealous i wish i saw scotland in the snow, i went there for two weeks this past summer and i just fell head over heels in love with it all, the culture, the land, the people, the mood- nothing that i have seen in the states that i have seen so far compare to it- wish i was there seeing scotland in the snow lol---- great poem :-)
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:iconlonelyeyes:
LonelyEyes Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
powerful imagery. i could feel myself falling. beautiful work!
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:icongothfey:
gothfey Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Wow, I like this interesting perspective on snowflakes. It really makes you wonder what it is feeling. Very beautiful piece!
Reply
:iconwernstrum:
wernstrum Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Ah philosophical reflection using falling objects. Not a new concept but enjoyable nevertheless.

There is a tiny dilemma in the "structure".
Knowing peace at last?
I can understand your usage of capitals in every line as traditionalism, but using a capital in the last line with a question mark makes that line the question by itself on first read. One of this poem's strengths is its fluidity. But this last line trips the reader and makes them have to read the whole stanza again.
On the other hand, if you remove the capital you hurt the structure.
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:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
Thank you for taking the time to write such an insightful comment on my piece. It's rare to find such consideration of a piece on dA. I salute you, friend :)

As for the structure of the final line, I think I might just leave it as it is - I'm a real traditionalist when it comes to spelling and punctuation....;)


Thanks again, friend for taking the time to write such a helpful comment :hug: :)
Reply
:iconallyhodges:
allyhodges Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Gorgeous! The imagery is so vivid! This is truly delightful and well written! Great job! ^____^
Reply
:icondraconianangel05:
draconianangel05 Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
wonderfully descriptive!
Reply
:iconameas-qua:
Ameas-Qua Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Beautiful,
Almost tear worthy,
The description of something so minescule yet so abundand. The expected emotion.


Amazing work.

My hats off to you my friend.
Reply
:iconmortalpsyche:
mortalpsyche Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
Kickass, boy.
Reply
:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
Thanks, girl ;)

And yes, it has taken me so long to get through all these bloody comments :roll:


=p
Reply
:iconmortalpsyche:
mortalpsyche Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2004
You could've just done one general reply, something along the lines of 'You're all beautiful! Thank you, and goodnight.'
Reply
:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2004
Bah! Lacks the personal touch.

Besides, replying to each of them's still better than doing work =p
Reply
:iconcelestial-seraphiman:
Celestial-SeraphiMan Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Writer
Congratulations on being selected for "Daily Deviation." This is splendid work. Please send a note to me when you get the chance--I may decide to illustrate it!
Reply
:iconawakenawareness:
AwakenAwareness Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Writer
This poem is already gorgeous on a surface level, as simply the tale of a snowflake's descent and return to the earth.
Yet I can't help but see a deeper symbolism in it. If "no two snowflakes are alike" then they are all unique, individual manifestations of the same source. Water. Humans too are made mostly of water.
We go through life, do our dance, have our moments, and then finally return to the "earth's firm kiss".
So do snowflakes accept their fate? Do we? Maybe the ones that do melt, "surrender their singularity" and return to the ocean, "the Drift", while the ones that don't evaporate back into the sky and continue being snowflakes.. Heh, I don't know, just a little Buddhist theory of reincarnation thrown in there.

This poem definitely made me think. +fav.
Reply
:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
Thank you, friend. It is truely a rare thing to find someone who considers the message behind a poem. I salute you. :hug:


And yes, you have struck somewhere near the mark of what I was intending. I actually verge something on the way towards buddhist philosophy, myself :)

ps. Appologies for taking so long to get back to you :(
Reply
:iconlunar-eclipse:
lunar-eclipse Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004  Hobbyist Artist
Magnificent poem. Truly woderful :love:
Reply
:iconjustb:
justb Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Writer
great poem, way to go back and capture the original thought you had without too much extra. I agree that that which was/ Lies silent' works very well.

This has another significant meaning with me.
Have you ever heard the saying that we know snow as just snow. We being western culture, when it snows, we only know it as snow, but a culture that lives in snow, like eskimos, they have another 20 words to describe snow, and they have 20 different kinds of snow. Because it is their life to know what kind of snow it is. I like how you hinted at you knew what kind of snow this was. I thought it was the same kind of snow.

Awaiting thaw/
And Spring's release.

And it's snowing outside. Everything's white. But it's not just snow, it's the world this poem signifies to me.
Reply
:iconzimeta:
Zimeta Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Truly inspired! :D what a great poem!
Reply
:iconingae:
Ingae Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Photographer
Beautiful
Reply
:iconsaladin:
saladin Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconxxxbadkittyxxx:
xxxbAdKiTtYxxx Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
that was beautiful
Reply
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